First of The Many to Come

 Last night, after 15 years, I was finally able to sleep again in the bedroom on a comfortable bed. Today, after 15 years, the first day of the many days to come without my beloved fur baby, Toby.

Toby was the first dog I personally took care of and looked after. He’s a Zuchon ~ Bichon x Zhi Shu. He’s very fluffy and so nice to cuddle. 

Toby doesn’t know any dog tricks. It took him seven years to master how to sit. But if you asked him “where is mummy” he will start looking for me or if he’s being carried and I am near him, he will extend his paw and tap my arms.

He also has an excellent sense of smell. This is one of the senses he hasn’t lost until his last minute with us. He knows where we keep his treats and if you placed it somewhere accessible to him, he’ll definitely steal it.

Toby also likes music. Most probably he acquired that passion from me. If he is restless at night, I will play some songs and he will go back to sleep.

I am happy that I have so many wonderful memories of my fur baby, and I will forever be keeping those memories of him in my heart. I told him yesterday, before he breathed his last breath, that I love him so much and no one can ever take his place in my heart.

My Toby, thank you for being such a wonderful fur baby. For being a good dog, son,  friend, companion, confidant. Thank you for taking good care and protecting me, daddy, your kuyas and ate. I know that no matter where you are, you will always be watching me and my family.

Run free now my Toby until we meet again.

16.10.2009 ~ 12.11.2024

Do What Makes You Happy

“Do what makes you happy” ~ A phrase I always hear in movies, at work, in public places and sometimes from people who are dear to me. But how easy is it to put this phrase into action?

When I was young doing things in a heartbeat was so easy. Often times I forget to carefully examine what will be the consequences of my actions. Everything was fine as long as it makes me happy.

As I grow older, especially when I became a mother, I become more cautious of my decisions and actions. I learned to prioritise the feelings of those people around me, most especially my loved ones. Over the years, the phrase “do what makes you happy” has changed to “choose what is right”.

Doing the right thing most of the time contradicts to what will make me happy. But at the end of the day, choosing what is right gives me peace of mind and in turn leads to infinite happiness.